From Ted
In dealing with my “Money Issues” over the last eight years, one of the first things I ran into was the curious phenomena that on the one hand I would tell people I would like to retire, and on the other hand, I was taking no action to do so. It made no sense, especially to me. In talking with a colleague one day, in the midst of trying to figure out yet one more of my inconsistent behaviors, I realized that I thought retirement meant that ‘you quit what you are doing, and, if anything, do something else you like less well’.
The ‘something else’ was, for me, way over the horizon. Literally, a very long way over the horizon. When pressed to describe where I would be and what I would be doing, I imagined myself sitting on a beach in Kauai, Hawaii, watching the waves come in and go out. Now to some of you that might sound exciting, but when it registered to me that this is what retirement would ‘look like’, I knew why I wasn’t taking any steps to make it possible for me to retire. I would hate sitting around. How very boring!!!! My picture of retirement meant that I would do nothing.
It suddenly dawned on me. Maybe I was using someone else’s definition of what retirement meant. What if I could define it for myself? The thought was very exciting. What if retirement meant that I could do what I wanted, when I wanted, with whom I wanted, and not have to do much of the other stuff? Now that would be exciting. Then the thought came, why wait to live that way. That was REALLY exciting to contemplate.
Over the next days, weeks, months, and years, I began moving in that direction. I began saving all the money I could, to make my ‘dream’ of retirement come true. I was lucky enough to be able to keep moving my life in that direction. Now I am officially ‘retired’, for the second time, in terms of what I used to do, and my world is filled with doing new things I could never have imagined eight years ago.
At this very moment, at the beginning of 2009, I am sitting in a room on Kauai writing my fourth book with our son Brad, while hanging out with my bride of 25 years. We are working with a major TV network on featuring some of our work. My consulting work has taken me all over the world. I get to spend special time with my granddaughter and our adult children. Now this is what I call retirement!!!
Giving me permission to define my own terms, such as deciding what retirement meant to me has opened up my world. I would invite you to give yourself the same gift.
What is your definition of ‘loving your partner’?
What is your definition of ‘being a friend’?
What is your definition of ‘being yourself’?
Do it your way.
